The 6 Spots Of Death

You know what I saw in Mongolia? yaks and mongs. No Xanadu, Kubla Khan or even Chakka Khan, Chakka Khan.

I saw a story on the web that was titled '6 spots to see before you die' this panicked me greatly as I had developed several large weeping spots on my penal system.

I pulled doon me gunties and counted, thank fuck there were only 5.

I call that irresponsible writing, scaring an Old man who is in God's waiting room.

I don't get telemarketers making constant phone calls but instead the Grim Reaper " Old Knudsen this is death, I have some important business information for you, please call me back at ************."

Yeah right I will, the Nazis haven't got me, Dog the fucking bounty bar hunter hasn't got me all those weemen with their paternity suits haven't got me and nor will death.

It was a travel site with 6 destinations to go to, well I counted and my maths not being too good since book learnin gave me heart burn I only counted 5, I added the last one to insult you.

Mount Kilimanjaro
Alaska
Mongolia
Antarctica
Atlantic Ocean
Yer Ma's G-spot

I've been to all 6 of these, yep 'all' 6 and they were crap and I'm still alive so fuck yous, ok the last one did give me the clap and spawned you but hey I'm still standing except right now I'm sitting.

At the end of the world it will be me and Keith Richards feeding off cockroaches and maybe if I'm desperate enough I'll make him feed off my cock for that terrible film appearance in that terrible pirate movie he was in.

Latest OBB News Up-Dates

We Want Yer Ring Frodo

Hey I believe my own eyes and if the bish goes about in nothing but Jesus sandals and a twat hat then fair play I found this picture on the Interweb so don't blame me.

Yes the Diocese of leeds has made it into my Gallery of Wankers on my sidebar. Check it out Bishop Arthur Roche, thats how I roll you blog Nazi and yes I have seen yer people search my blog for the story but I changed the key words, just search Catholic Priests and you'll get it, not too bright huh?

Latest OBB News Up-Dates

They Can Take My Comments But They'll Never Take My FREEDOM!

My old dog Buddha used to run off with my last wives' dildo we named Muhammad ach happy times until that bitch ran off with that muscle man from the meat counter, the wife went with her.

A few days ago a comment I made on an AOL news story about Britney Spears was either flagged or reported and I got a warning from the TOS people at AOL.

What I said was she was a White trash hoorbag, the last time I checked calling someone white trash wasn't a crime, as for hoorbag what the fuck does that mean anyway?

My passion gets the better of me sometimes and I have to comment, you know what I'm like so when I read the story of a gurl who was murdered and dumped by the road by some cunt and that she had appeared naked in pictures on some adult sites and they were calling her a porn star well I got annoyed, It was just sensationalism and being biased which should only be used for fake news.

I said something like posing for naked pictures doesn't make you a porn star, being an ex porn star I should know this.

I have issues about the sinful nakedness of the human body forced upon me by the kind and loving Presbyterian church and try to over come this and show people its just tits, stop trying to deny yer lustful thoughts its only being human.

Yer actions make you a good or bad person talk is cheap or on blogs its free!

I hit "add" on the AOL comments for the story and my comment came up empty and then deleted. I tried again using orn with a "P" instead of using the word porn but no they deleted it.

I went to another story and posted a comment no problem so I went back to the so-called porn star story and tried again, the comments they had were far worse than mine and they were just spamming with the same comments 10 times in a row but that got put up ok.

I typed in "I like corn" it got deleted, I then typed in "I really really like corn" and that got deleted so I then typed "I like corn but I love Jesus" that comment got posted, it makes you think about the power that the morality police have and AOL (Absence Of Liberty) are just one step away from the Taliban and banning dildos named Muhammad.

I don't like corn by the way, most new world foods go through me like a dose of salts, luckily potatoes come from Ireland.

Old Knudsen Seeks A Wife With Monkey Lips.

Now this is what I am talking about, c'mon men you've watched Songs of Praise and have been turned on by the close ups of the singers.

Do you hear the song birds singing in the trees? do you get beat up by a gang of thugs , smile and shake it off? well you must be in love. I Old Knudsen am in love, not a pure angelic love with the woman of my dreams high up on a pedestal, but a dirty, sweaty this will be over in a minute kind of love that leaves a stain and a musty odour.
I have mentioned song birds and angels and the target of my obsessive stalking is an angelic song bird named Meav . I don't know her last name and don't see that as a problem, shes a dirty Dubliner but my love is blind.

See why my love is blind? shes a cracker.

My beautiful Meav sings on the Celtic Woman CDs and concerts and when the camera settles on her as she holds a long note with her chest swelling I start to feel quite anxious.
It reminds me of when I was arguing with my 2nd wife over something silly like leaving loaded guns all over the hoose (the nazis do want me dead) and she said about her getting killed and how would I be able to life with myself then, well it took me all of 3 seconds to reply and I said, "as long as you die with yer mouth open making monkey lips I'll be ok, in fact our sex live might greatly improve".
No idea why that marriage failed, she must of secretly have been a leezer.
Here is a link to my darling Meav, and just remember shes mine.