Joe The Plumber, Time Man Of The Year 2009? We'll See

"I'll totally bust up yer ass, I'll bitch slap you into next week and then I'll swallow yer gravy."

Joe the Plumber who is in Sderot Israel to cover the Israeli side of its military offensive in Gaza and to give me blog fodder has sent back his first riveting account.

The expendable Ohio man, went to tell readers of the conservative pjtv.com Web site about the Israeli use of excessive force on the Gaza Strip. Now you know Old Knudsen he constantly calls for the death penalty for pedos and rapists because he doesn't believe that some people should be allowed to live, its the only sensible solution .

Why keep people around draining yer resources especially during a time of economic recession when you can go to Big Five and buy 400 bullets for yer .22 rifle for $20.00. Just shoot them all in the head and clean it up after a couple days.
Money well spent and saved. All the prison guards who get paid more money than teachers can be sent to the secret torture prisons and those soldiers there can go to the front or returned home.

It all made total sense today as I sat on the bog and pinced off a loaf.

Joe said that the people of Sderot "can't do normal things day to day" like get soap in their eyes in the shower, for fear of rockets. Well at least they only fire rockets during the day those pussy Palestinians too lazy to do night shifts huh?
When I lived in Belfast the Fenian savages bombed the Orange hall at the end of my street at THREE O'CLOCK IN THE FUCKIN MORNIN, I shouted out the window, "people are trying to sleep around here ya cunts."

Who is Joe kidding? they don't take showers in the middle east they oil up their feet and thats them all fresh, sorta like the French who apply more perfume instead of washing.

Joe stood in front of a pile of spent rockets and said: "I have thousands of questions but I can't think of the right one."
How about "why are you standing in front of spent rockets?" You do know they still find live ordnance from WWII under the streets of London and in Germany.

"Why hasn't Israel acted sooner?" Wurzelbacher asked. "I know if I were a citizen here, I'd be damned upset."

So would I be mate, they have reporters like Lauren Sanchez but instead they send a big baldy plumber like you to ask stupid questions.

Spunking over Joe's baldy ugly head or Ms Sanchez' s tits? now thats a tough one.

The self described "peaceloving man," said "when someone hits me, I'm going to unload on the boy. And if the rest of the world doesn't understand that, then I'm sorry."

Just like the Kung Fu series, "I am a man of peace" :::whack!::: Ka-Chow!:::: Crunch!:::: as David Carradine kicks arse and then has a smoke and plays on his skin flute.

"I'm going to unload on the boy."


Unload on me Joe long time


Is it just me or do Americans sound ghey when they try to talk tough? So far over here I've had someone say they were going to Fuck me up and another say c'mon ya little fag yer ass is mine and Do you want a piece of this?

Even when goaded further all they did was yell swear and beat their chests, it was embarrassing.

Joe is ever so biased which is why Israel allowed him to report there. I demand that they send him to the Gaza Strip to get full coverage.

Speaking of biased I was watching the BBC and they have a bloke in the Gaza Strip, while he was reporting another wog poked up his head and said, " I'm an Australian I've cum to fight Israel" well done you stupid cunt don't think that will stop the Jews going all Krav Maga on yer arse.


I am from Lapland death to the Jews.

Bias is a very interesting beast. For many years the Yanks have sent money and guns to the IRA to kill their own people and British people, they saw the Irish terrorists as freedom fighters, yes Americans aren't too bright but they like to join in.

Will they begrudge the other Ragheads and ill informed dickheads for thinking that the Palestinians are freedom fighters? As Old Knudsen has said "One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter."

Rodney King
Hezbollah
Hamas
Sinn Fein
Taliban
Jehovah Witnesses
Iran
Russia
China
The Troll

All cunts and if you think otherwise then yer a mong and so is yer best friend if you have one.


Those from Northern Ireland have maybe seen the odd road block consisting of weemen with with babies in strollers. They cause the trouble until the men get off work or get liquored up enough.
The police move in and one mobile phone call has the thick necked husbands out in force.

Mouthy fish wives which is why the above picture isn't shocking to me, its not like he hit them or anything, the gurl on the right needs 2 for flinching. Beat them good looking lad.

13 dead Jews to 480 dead Palestinians. The Japs tried to fire bomb America with balloons during WWII, they were not very effective just like the Hamas rockets that keep getting fired into Israel but the intent was there. Treat others as they would treat you which is why Japan was fire bombed killing thousands.


Now c'mon ya lazy Jews turn the Gaza Strip into a car park.

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Deaf To Joe The Plumber

Its true I haven't been around the Blogs as much as I'd like to of late. Well thats a lie if I wanted to go around you pack of cunts I would . I've been busy getting ready for the great depression. Plenty of ammo, beer and antidepressants. Maybe I should return to Killamory at least I'd be safe there as long as I could keep up with my false identity of course. Those police think they are so smart and I don't care how much DNA was recovered you need to find a body. I don't want ta fucking talk about it, you don't understand you weren't there.

So any way in the style of the ugly American abroad Joe the Plumber is going to Israel as a war correspondent for the conservative Web site pjtv.com. Joe Wurzelbacher who backed the presidential loser John McCain will be dipping his unworldly and poorly educated oar into the field of foreign affairs and I don't mean fucking some Turkish hoor while away on yer honeymoon which I must add was justified as my 7th wife and I were on a split at the time.

He doesn't think any harm will cum to him because he is Christian and will be protected by God. Well thats what John the baptist and Jesus the upholsterer said too.



It isn't called the Holy land for nothing.

Back story.
Palestine is fucked. Israel was formed after WWII taking over Arab land instead of being given parts of Germany. At one time Palestine asked their Arab friends to help them but the other Arabs said, "Hold Palestine as an example of Arab pride, you shall be remembered well."

Hamas which is a political/terrorist organisation like Hezbollah and Sinn Fein were supported and voted in by the idiot Palestinian people thus sealing their own fate. My sympathies to the children caught up in the war but you were only going to grow up to be a dickhead like yer parents.

Hamas won't stop firing missiles into Israel and these rockets are getting in further so Israel being sensible has taken the advice my late father once gave me, " Hey fuck face, if you ever get into a fight pick up something and hit the other guy with it and make sure they don't get up, now go to yer ma and get yer nappy changed you smell like beefy shit lad."


Joe who supports Israel is going over in an unbiased way to ask the Israelis.

1) Are Arabs cunts or what?

2) If you were a colour what colour would you be?

3) Did you kill Jesus because he was white and had blue eyes?

and

4) Why is everything so small over here? In America we have big buildings and big bombs the only thing thats big here is yer noses.


Please Jews if you want to make up for killing Jesus feel free to torture Joe and nail him to a cross.
Make him suffer for my sins which are pretty substantial, just ask yer ma.


I, Punch drunk airline pilot recently flew over to Israel for a holiday and a spiritual pilgrimage. I went for the old 'when in Rome do as the Romans do thing.'


So I gave into Jew peer pressure and signed the death warrant for a diety . Ame-No-Tanabata-Hime-No-Mikoto. No one you'd know a Shinto Goddess of weavers, all the good ones have been done already.

Then I washed my hands over the whole thing, but not in their water. Male piss is sterile so I used that thus sterilising my hands. Then I amazed the local weemen by picking up peanuts with me foreskin and afterwards I showed them why a foreskin is so important ......... ribbed for her pleasure is the term. What is better a covenant between man and God or a wife with multiple orgasms?


I've already written a screenplay of Joe's life. Some scenes have already been shot I may have to do a re-write if he gets killed in the middle east ................. C'mon Hamas ya useless cunts just aim for the large shiny dome.

Here is the main scene of the movie, "Listen up Obama you high yellow terrorist negro, I wanna hear yer tax plans and I wanna hear them NOW!"



Joe the Plumber, he doesn't take any shit from low flow toilets . This film has not yet been made.



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Who Is Joe The Plumber?

Not a licensed plumber to start with. Plumbers aren't too bright at the best of times and those who masquerade as plumbers just to get the chicks are even worse. In the future everyone will be anonymous for 15 minutes Joe and many others have complained about the coverage he has got as they think that Obama's answer should have gotten more. Here is something to think about.

Tip #1: If you have evaded paying over $1000 in taxes do not appear in front of 50 cameras asking a presidential candidate a tax question he has answered many times.

Tip#2: Use a potato to bung up the end stop water gushing from a broken pipe until you can repair or turn it off.

Tip#3: If yer head looks like a potato do not shave it.

Tip#4: After trying to embarrass said presidential candidate by asking him a guilt laden question full of yer own personal details do not complain about the media coverage you receive after wards no one made you do it.

Tip#5: Do not meet and greet the press when they turn up at yer hoose.

Tip#6: If you say you don't like the coverage go into hiding, don't go onto the radio.

Tip#7: Accept the book deal thats bound to be offered.




UPDATE:

Knudsen the cunt asked presidential candidate John McCain if the economy was still sound the answer he received was "fundamentally".

He then asked him what will hurt more, losing the campaign or having lost Nam? At that point tax payer employed secret service moved in to kick Knudsen's shit in.

It turns out that Knudsen owes billions to Iceland and once rented out Platoon.


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