Bitter Russian Tea Balls

Old Knudsen has long since forgiven the former USSR for those rubber gloved searches in East Berlin and for those 4 long years in a Gulag. Those bastards never returned my cool diver's watch or my microfilm (only one was shoved up my rusty bullet hole and it wasn't the giant black watch).

I've been watching Russia from the time when David Hasslehoff defeated the red scourge and I must say they've only changed on the surface, if you're a Russian Mariner and get into trouble, you had better hope the British are coming to the rescue, the Russian government doesn't think too much about losing military personnel , more where they came from.
If you are a Russian civilian caught up in a hostage situation kiss yer arse goodbye, its like the American government on evil steroids. Putin swaggers about like a tough guy, handing out knives instead of medals to war heroes, when he looks at Bush you can tell hes thinking of ways he can with a swift blur of motion kill this pretend Ronald Reagan, the KGB are like a bunch of fascist crooked cops, who better to run the country?.

There were some Japanese fishermen fishing in Japanese waters but near to the Russian administered Kuril Islands, it was out of season to fish for crabs, something Japanese and Russian bureaucrats agreed on probably so the Russians can do secret shit and not have too many people about, on one tells the Japs what they can't fish for, just ask the Whales, anyway who hasn't sat at the mouth of a river to poach er fish for Salmon?, us fisher folk are free spirits.

Now Old Knudsen fought the Nips at Dunkirk, I still have a scar from one of their spears, I hold no grudges, the Russians however took over the Kuril Islands in 1945 when the war ended and have kept them ever since, you know what they are like, they would put a cup of piss in a lockbox and guard it like it was top secret, if you looked at it wrong you'd be shot.
These fishermen were too close for the Russian's comfort so they fired a warning shot, now Old Knudsen has had plenty of warning shots fired over his head but this warning shot was fired into the head of one of the fishermen killing him, fair warning, he won't do that again.

The three remaining fishermen were questioned and face charges for fishing crabs, knowing the Russians that means 2 days of torture and life in a Gulag.
For accumulating bastard deeds including cutting off oil to parts of your country to show who the boss is, being mates with the next rulers of the earth (the Chinks) and selling weapons to Iran saying, if we didn't do it someone else would. Russia is sent to the Gallery of Wankers, you sit there and think about things.