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Tuesday, January 30, 2007

I Just Want To Thank All Those I Stepped On Along The Way.


On the 25th February its Oscar night again, firstly I don't care if you don't give a shit about the Oscars and say its all Hollywood politics with everyone scratching each other's backs, go read a more witty and interesting Blog then, whats that? can't find one ok then this is what I have to offer.

Old Knudsen hasn't gone ghey, last week in that public restroom was a misunderstanding and we both shook hands about it afterwards, of course I couldn't look him in the eye. (a short fella)
I can't wait to see what Versace or Vera Wang come up with , its my dream to walk up the red carpet and have some dopey hoor like Joan Rivers ask me "who are you wearing" and I'll say "Burtons" or "Marks and Sparks" and then up comes Matt Damon who plays the Young Knudsen and Antony Hopkins who plays the Old one.
"Is it true Old Knudsen that you're dating Salma Hayek?" being a gentlemen I like to be discreet where the ladies are concerned,"no I merely fucked her in the ass as she was on her moons and played with her tities, check out my Blog for the full story".

Don't worry when I'm famous I'll still remember you little people that read me during the time in which I was Blogging in a local Burger King while holding doon two jobs and supporting a family of 6. I have no idea who the family were, parasitic fuckers the lot of them. Of course you lot will disappear when I start charging £10 a post or £29.99 a month, what a bargain.

The movies this year are really really shite and I have not seen any of them but that doesn't stop me from having a go, I'm so disappointed in these films, so anyway any other categories I don't care like Sound Editing, who gives a fuck? and you can tell how bad a movie is when all its in is Visual Effects, Superman returns and Poseidon. If Scorsese doesn't do well this year he may very well cry, its his turn.
Here are Old Knudsen's picks for the 2007 Oscars.

Best Picture: Babel............ it has to get something card

Best Actor: Leonardo DiCaprio........... Not a great choice card

Best Actress: Helen Mirren............. Queen card

Best Supporting Actor: Djimon Hounsou ............If not then Eddie Murphy race card

Best Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett ..............we like her card

Best Director: Martin Scorsese..................... pity card


For each I get wrong I will donate £50.00 to charity. Or I'll just say fuck off, yeah that sounds better .

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