For Shatner.

On board the USS Enterprise.

Captain Kirk sat alone in his darkened quarters, his large tight melon like stomach heaved before him, perspiration dripped down his face, he was on the edge and didn't know why.
"Bones, Bones" he yelled into the intercom, "what, theheck , is wrongwithme?" a raspy voice replied, "whats wrong Jim, is it the Klingons?" Kirk thought for a moment, "No , Bones , therashhas , gone , away", "sex Jim sex", Kirk smiled bashfully, "you do know , Ihavealways , liked, youDoctor", "not me you animalistic sex mad wang driven freak, I'm a doctor not a jar of raw liver, how long has it been since you blasted off".
Kirk stared at his fingers concentrating, " at least 2 hours Bones, ohmygodI've got, togetsome, what about Sulu?" "not your type Jim, he likes to go solo".
"Ok Doctor I'll callaround".
"Kirk to Yawhoreyou, report to my torpedo", "not if you were the last man in space Whitey".
Kirk thumped his table in rage, "Kirk to Mr Scott, I, havesomething , foryou, tofix". "No Captain, I canna take anymore, I was nae expectin to take it into action".
"Kirk to Spock, I , neeeeeed , youMrSpock".
"Spock here Captain, it would be illogical to fulfill your needs, I am not your space bitch, besides Captain, I am on my Pon Farr, do you think my ears make me look fat?:::sob sob:::".
"GoddamnitSpock , bring , meaTribble , then , Iwillgowhere , no , man hasgone before".
Little did the mighty Kirk know that Chekov had already gone there and was in sick bay going through a Tribble removal operation.


From The Urban Dictionary


Angry Kirk

Having sex with someone and just as you are about to cum grab them by the hair and scream 'KHAN!!!!'

I was really giving it to her and in the heat of the moment I grabbed her hair and screamed 'KHAN!!!' like Angry Kirk from Star Trek.



In memory of the great William Shatner.