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Sunday, November 12, 2006

Fish Fingers.



The most common sight that an old fisherman might see while hes out baiting his creels during a day of fishing would be a seagull, the 4th most common would be a Mermaid.
A beautiful woman down to the waist and then instead of legs she has a fish tail, they usually sit on a rock combing their hair and singing like a bored secretary.
The waters I used to fish in were bitterly cold and a sexy woman with nipples popped up like corks was a little hard to ignore, sure enough the fishtail is easy to forget about, what can I say we men are pigs.
Now Mermaids being magickal creatures can often be unpredictable, they can tell you the future, give you some sashimi lovin or lure you to the depths and to your death, very much like the dating scene played out by humans.
Men being the brave and fearless souls they are will 9 out of 10 times risk death if theres the chance of them getting their hole, the weemen don't even have to be that pretty just showing up is enough for us.

I think Mermaids are the perfect woman, first you date them for 10 or 15 minutes and then its time for dinner, they may get a little suspicious when your adventurous sex games involve tartar sauce.

Take care that you don't get a Seamaid, they are just as beautiful and tempting as a Mermaid but only want to drown you in the depths of the sea and go through your pockets. They view men as most weemen view their ex husbands.




Mer-men are just as fair looking if not more then the maids, David Beckham and Wentworth Miller would be considered ugly compared to them, don't bother here ladies, these product using Mer-men only want hot Seamen, yeah yeah what a waste, I'm a human being, not just a piece of meat to be lusted over by the fish folks, well ok I don't mind that much.

Coastal regions around the world have their own Mer-people. In the waters around the Scottish Highlands are the ceasg or Maighdean na tuinne, maiden of the wave, a beautiful but dangerous creature, if you caught one she was obliged to grants you 3 wishes, dems the rules.

Once when I was out poaching, er i mean fishing for Salmon I caught a Ceasg in my net.
She was a tasty looking wee bint but mad as hell,she said,"normally I'd grant three wishes but you're that Old Knudsen fucker so you're only getting one". I knew I had to be careful what to wish for, I had caught plenty of salmon to sell at a good price so money wasn't my need, I hadn't had a good shag in a week and seeing the greater boobied fish gurl was making me kinda anxious so I said,"I want to wake up in bed with 3 weemen" .
The next morning I woke up with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding and Hilary Clinton, I had no penis a broken leg and no health insurance.



I heard it said once that Old Knudsen sold his soul for a cheap laugh .

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